Tagged: messy parenting 101; questions
June 26, 2020 at 10:03 pm #594Alicia HernonParticipant
If you have questions about anything we brought up in this talk, we would love to hear them. If a point was not clear or if you need more examples about something we brought up, please let us know so we can make the talk even better!
June 29, 2020 at 1:58 pm #639Adam StanislawskiParticipant
Rita and I really enjoyed the videos and felt like you were talking directly to us. Thanks! They definitely felt personalized.
When we got to question #5, we talked a lot about the “how to” of guarding, protecting, and communicating love. This reminded me of two quotes from past spiritual reading that gave us some ideas:
- By St. Charbel Makhlouf, “Guard your families and keep them from the schemes of the evil one through the presence of God in them. Protect and keep them through prayer and dialog, through mutual understanding and forgiveness, through honesty and faithfulness, and most importantly, through listening. Listen to one another with your ears, eyes, hearts, mouths and the palms of your hands, and keep the roaring of the noise of the world away from your homes because it is like raging storms and violent waves; once it enters the home, it will sweep away everything and disperse everyone. Preserve the warmth of the family, because the warmth of the whole world cannot make up for it.”
- By St. Josemaría Escrivá, “Listen to your children. Give them your time, even the time that you have reserved for yourselves. Show them your confidence; believe whatever they tell you, even if sometimes they try to deceive you. Don’t be afraid when they rebel, because, at their age, you yourselves were more or less rebellious. Go to meet them half-way and pray for them. If you act in this Christian manner, they will come to you with simplicity, instead of trying to satisfy their legitimate curiosity by talking to some vulgar friend. Your confidence, your friendly dealings with your children, will receive an answer in their sincerity in dealing with you. Then, even if there are quarrels and lacks of understanding, they will never amount to much; and this is what peace in the family and a truly Christian life mean.”
Reflecting on these spurred us to choose two virtues of the week to work on as a family: gentleness and self-control. So, thank you Mike and Alicia for sparking this conversation to help us get over the hump and be more intentional in our family! We introduced them to the kids this morning, and I think they’re on board, so far… We’ll let you know how it goes!
July 3, 2020 at 4:41 pm #647Lisa BairdParticipant
Thank you for your first talk about parenting. My husband and I really enjoyed listening to it. I loved it when your husband said that God does not call us to do things that we can do, but instead calls us to turn to Him and surrender and think beyond our means. This really spoke to my heart, because being a mom to our three children has pushed me beyond my abilities. Julia’s needs were so sever for so long I could not see an end or improvement. I was used to the control that if I study hard then you earn good grades. Suddenly in the most important area of my life – my motherhood it did not matter how hard I worked to help Julia- God was not going to solve the problem anytime soon. So many days I had to surrender everything and walk blindly into the future not knowing when the storm would end. Luckily with amazing doctors and about ten different trails of medications- we got her to a place where our family could function. It really was a miracle because a friend of mine went on a pilgrimage and she took a set of beads that Julia would use to twirl around for a sensory need and she placed the beads at the alter. The day she was there was the day we started Julia on a medication where nine other ones had failed to help and she instantly was regulated and happy. God did not take away the Autism, but He gave us relief and our family could function so much better. Not long after that though things become harder for our youngest child and doctors recommended he go through the same psychological battery of tests to determine if he is on the spectrum. It was so hard for Bill and I to understand because he presents so differently than Julia and is much higher functioning. Anyways, God led us again to a wonderful doctor and Andrew also met the criteria to be on the spectrum. They no longer give the diagnosis of Asperger, but if they did then that is how Andrew is like. Once again I was so scared and depressed because I was not sure why God would give us such hope for Julia’s situation, but then so quickly set us out seeking answers for Andrew. Anyway, this was a long way to say that I related to the statement about God asking us to accomplish things beyond our reach. If is was not for our children with special needs then I would not have felt so incompetent to help them and literally came to the conclusion that I need to sufferer all of my disappointments and worry about the future over to God.
July 7, 2020 at 2:55 pm #652Julia WrightParticipant
As my husband and I watched this, we paused it to discuss several points. We also liked the reflection questions so that the conversation continued even further. I continue to mull this idea of parenting making us more fully who we are meant to be, shaping us, molding us, and God willing, sanctifying us. I recently began praying a prayer to love Jesus more. The first thing I noticed was a greater love and tenderness for my children. I love how God uses absolutely everything accomplish so much. It is truly awesome.
My husband really liked that this was not a “10 step process to parenting” type of talk. He liked the theology. We both did. 🙂 We look forward to really diving into this more with the community, while also seeing how this looks practically in the day to day.
August 9, 2020 at 3:33 pm #712MarisaParticipant
Adam thank you for sharing those spiritual reading you and Rita discussed. They are posted on my desktop to reflect on when things in the house seem to get heated.
Lisa thank you for sharing your story and experience reminding us we have a loving God we can turn to always with anything we are facing in life.
Yes, Julia I love the theology as well. It’s a lot different then my other mom/parenting groups I am part of.
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